Learn more Approach the task of making friends with a gay male as you would anyone else. Gay or straight, you must be kind and respectful to the other person to gain their trust and respect. Don't befriend someone for their sexual orientation. If you have some sort of expectation from someone because of their sexuality, you will be disappointed.
Meet gay men. Look around at work, at school If those outlets don't seem to work, grab some of your fabulous girlfriends and head to a gay bar for a night of dancing.
After the dance, strike up a conversation and grab a cocktail. Introduce your friends to each other. Do NOT treat someone who is gay differently than you would your straight friends. Don't act desperate to be his friend.
Be friendly, clever , attractive , and a real friend. If you want someone to be willing to listen to your troubles, you have to be there for him too. Don't make assumptions about what a gay man is into just because they are gay. Get to know them as an individual and if you share interests, maybe you'll become friends. Don't assume your gay friend will want to do "girl things" with you. Television and movies are not accurate in how they portray gay men. For every male you meet that does match movie stereotypes, there are two that don't.
Such is true for all media stereotypes. Don't talk about girly bodily functions or assume he wants to wear makeup or go shopping for fashionable clothes. It is not only a mistake, it's insulting.
Never forget, a gay friend is NOT a boyfriend. You cannot change him, convert him, or make out with him. Getting your heart involved is dangerous- you will get hurt and it's not fair when you know he's gay from the beginning. Don't compare your gay friend to a straight one. If you expect your friends to stick by you, they should still be your friends even when you're in a relationship and vice versa.
If your boyfriend gets jealous of the time you spend with other friends, gay or straight, think about whether he's right for you. Do you really want someone that possessive? I like a guy, he's my best friend, and he's gay.
He also knows I like him, but he sends mixed signals about how he feels. Should I keep holding on? No, if he says hes gay you should respect his feelings. If you keep holding on you'll just be hurt. Yes No.
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Not Helpful 7 Helpful Accept that you cannot change his sexuality, and try to become friends instead. New Releases. Add to Wishlist. BoyAhoy is the global network for meeting gay men. Instantly meet like-minded men near you or around the world. Discover new friends at a local bar or in Barcelona.
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Oftentimes, these people become de facto family, in place of those who can't or won't support properly. Here, in their own words, are three men's stories of their first queer friendships. Then we started chatting and he said "I'm gay" in the most offhand way. At this point I was still closeted and had a girlfriend, so seeing someone so self-assured and confident about their sexuality was a big deal.
I found it empowering, and it made me feel less alone. I guess Alex was a really good marker for me in terms of coming out and owning my sexuality. And he always supported me. He didn't instill a sense of internalized homophobia in me, which was important because I was a campy gay guy who'd always been teased for being campy. Alex welcomed and encouraged that side of my personality, which was really affirming.
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He also introduced me to RuPaul's Drag Race during, like, season two—back then, it was a pretty niche show, so he was ahead of the curve. He was so confident about eschewing gender norms and stanning certain queens. He didn't care what anyone else thought and that influence really helped me get my life. I've known him for 11 years now and he's been a very loyal friend.
He can be a little shit sometimes, but he's always had my back and lifted me up. He challenges me and puts me in situations I'd never put myself in otherwise. I think part of the beauty of queer friendship is that it can kind of develop into family, and that's definitely what me and Alex feel like now. I came out as bi in early I'm married so it wasn't about finding a partner; it was about not lying any more. I met Charlie on Twitter about 18 months later. He's a transgender man who came out at roughly the same time as me.